Reflection on My Attempts to Have a Satisfying Summer

My Own Utopian Experiment #23: Practice abundance in time and Urgent Self-care

I really tried something new to spend this summer to work and have some fun time with my little one. I wrote about the plan in the previous post (https://invitedtoshare.com/gratitude-perfect-summer/). Without summer school, there were lots of ups and downs. What’s important is that I managed this summer juggling both work and being a mom. I learned a lot.

I used to take summer break as bitter and sweet. I love to spend more time with him but did not like to juggle with his and my work schedule. I am a sensitive person. I would like to be mindful and do one thing at a time. That’s how I feel grounded and centered. Summer is challenging since I need to muti-task more. At the end of summer, I tend to feel not completing neither of them right. I am not a perfectionist but meeting both needs is not easy. My desires to do both, working and being a mom I want to be often conflict the most during the summer. My heart wants to be with my kid while he is home more and he is still little. My desire and responsibility to work conflict with mom’s desire. I balance between the two but I tend to struggle during the summer. I felt like I was missing out a lot. It took some time to admit this but this is my honest description.

I really tried to turn that around this summer. I do not think I mastered it quite yet but that’s the beauty. It is imperfect but in progress. We all grow and each season has different demands and priorities. Going to the right direction means more than anything. I realize that I am the one who need to change the mentality. I felt not having enough down time to spend with him during the summer in deep down. It turns out he has never felt that way. He told me I was always there. I am the best mom he ever hopes for. I am the mom who plays and take him to places. The little conversation literally healed me the half way. I always knew quantity does not matter. Quality does. I knew but did not really “feel” it. I am working on it. Again, walking toward the right direction.

I am also practicing abundance in time, having enough time to go around. I am most myself when I slow down and do one thing at a time, being with now. While I know this, it really had to remind myself during the summer while I multi-task a lot most of the days. His schedule, my work deadlines, meetings, lunches, pickups, etc. I realized that I can’t feel contentment while feeling shortage of time for what matters. I learned to slow down while things are a bit chaotic. I can’t be mindful without slowing down to take one at a time. That’s what I really need, not only see the abundance but feel it. As I try this daily, I tend to fall out of cycle during the summer. I need to practice this more to stick with me stronger. I will see how next summer goes. I am still a student in life so that does not bother me as long as I am learning and progressing in a good way. Walking toward the right direction. Growth mindset!

It is true that summer means a lot of fun but extra work for mom and dad too. I am highly affected by how I spend my time, the way I spend the day, what I am surrounded by, what I eat, what I am thinking, etc. I am happy how the summer went in general. It was fun but I admit I am tired. I need some tunning to get back to my normal schedule. When I feel like this, it is urgent. I do small things that bring me back little by little daily. I used to be very impatient and get frustrated when I can’t pick up myself fast. I do not do that to myself anymore. I give the time that my body and soul need. A progress is a hope regardless how little that is.

This is what I am planning to do next a few weeks. I want to share in case any parents feel the same and need some ideas. There is nothing big but I enjoy many little pleasures comparing to one big thing. Some of you are near me so please reach out if you want to join. Sending my love as always. I hope you all had the great summer!

    Food Therapy

    Have you even felt so much better after your comfort foods? To me, it heals my body with nutrition and my soul with comfort. It feeds both. It often becomes a perfect medicine without any side-effects. I have the list of food that I can cook just for myself or get it from my favorite places. There’s one desert place I want to visit. Quite far but it would be interesting.

    Lunch Dates

    I am working but I need to eat anyway. It is a great excuse to go out and get some air. Good food and good people never get old for me.

    Little Shopping

    I am not very big on shopping but I have a few self-care items I would like to have.

    Little massage pillow, facial essence masks (perfect way to relax for me), some fresh flowers, good a pair of walking shoes

    Daily Walks

    I need to catch up this week on work but I will have morning walks next week

    Watch Movies

    See Friends

    This is the by far the best one for me.

    Find a Working Space

    I have a couple places to visit. This is exciting. Even though I may not get the space, it feels like an adventure.

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